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This Human by Melis Senova

🐈 The Third Principle of Difficult Conversations

Published about 2 months ago • 1 min read

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Curiosity killed the cat. Did it though?

When we work with people within our organisations, sometimes we forget they are also humans, with squishy insides and their own insecurities, fears and concerns.

We see their role, not the person.

It's easy to get defensive if you feel their point of view is questioning your own... but we have an antidote for you...

STAY CURIOUS!

This is the third principle of how to have better difficult conversations—Exploration over Defensiveness.

Every conversation you have will most likely be with another human being. Mostly. Even the most accomplished, senior person can feel unsure, vulnerable, inadequate and alone.

We all have struggles and we all have insecurities. Remain curious within the conversation, even when it gets hard.

Explore what is driving the other person to take the position they are taking in the conversation. In another words, get curious about it rather than judging it.

Connect with their experience and gain insight into their position before trying to establish yours. This gives you important context.

Incorporate their language and use their words. This helps build connection.

By remaining curious, you're able to create a bit of distance between your natural defensive reaction and the outcome the conversation is trying to serve.

And it's much more fun!

You've got this.

Love,

PS. Next week we'll explore the fourth principle of how to have better difficult conversations: Heart first, then Head (do the hokey pokey and you turn around...). 🎵🪇

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This Human by Melis Senova

Helping designers lead.

Enabling senior design professionals to be more influential within their organisations. ✨ Author of this human and design character, published by BIS Publishers.📚

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