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Let's explore the SMEH of boundaries...

What's that?

It's a pretty average acronym with an important message.
It stands for:

• Setting
• Maintaining
• Enforcing
• Honouring

Let's dig in...

SETTING BOUNDARIES
​Identifying and setting boundaries is crucial for our wellbeing and safety, both personally and professionally. Feelings of being taken advantage of or ignored often signal crossed boundaries we didn’t know existed. A reflective process helps uncover and define these boundaries, re-establishing our physical, emotional, and psychological safety.

MAINTAINING BOUNDARIES
​Boundary setting isn’t a one-time activity. Regularly revisiting and reassessing boundaries ensures they support our work and growth. Some boundaries may be remnants from the past, so a boundary maintenance routine is essential to adapt to changing contexts.

It's also worth considering whether our boundaries are rigid or permeable. Is there wiggle room or a reinforced steel vault? Both have their merits.

ENFORCING BOUNDARIES
​Many avoid enforcing boundaries due to discomfort or fear of hurting others. This choice often transfers the suffering onto us, leading to resentment and feelings of #%&@! It’s always better to remind others of our boundaries, ensuring clarity and mutual respect.

HONOURING BOUNDARIES
​Globally, everyone has the right to set and communicate their boundaries, yet many lack the agency to have theirs honoured. For those privileged to engage in this discussion, it calls for self-awareness and a willingness to respect others’ boundaries whenever possible. Embracing this mindset fosters healthier interactions and authentic connection.

So there you have the boundary lifecycle.

Consider reflecting on your own boundaries: How do you SMEH: set, maintain, enforce, and honour them?

You’ve got this.

Love,

PS. Next week we'll set our sights on types of boundaries: starting with physical. En garde! 🤺

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