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The Police said it best...

Sending out an S.O.S
Sending out an S.O.S
Sending out an S.O.S

Obviously they were talking about;

Solidarity
​Over
​Self-righteousness

This is the second principle of how to have better difficult conversations.

In difficult conversations, what would it mean to focus on solidarity rather than proving you’re right? Co-operation comes from recognising what unites you, not what divides you. Before the conversation, reflect on shared goals to ensure you approach it from a collaborative, rather than adversarial, mindset.

For example, if you’re a leader addressing a team conflict, remember that everyone ultimately wants the project to succeed. Instead of asserting your authority, you could say, “We both want the best outcome. How can we combine our approaches to achieve that?” A well-timed open question does wonders.

If we look at the same situation through a design lens, rather than doggedly enforcing your idea, you might say, “We both care about creating a great user experience. How can we integrate our perspectives to reach that goal?”

By committing to finding common ground rather than seeking validation, you shift the conversation towards co-operation and mutual respect.

This approach not only de-escalates conflict but also strengthens relationships and builds trust. When solidarity is the priority, difficult conversations become more productive and meaningful for everyone involved.

You've got this.

Love,

PS. Next week we'll explore the third principle of how to have better difficult conversations: Exploration over Defensiveness (the plot thickens). 👨🏻‍🍳

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