"What am I wanting from this relationship that I’m not getting...and is this the place to be getting it?"

Sometimes, the tension in a work relationship isn’t about the work at all.

It’s about the roles we’re unconsciously playing.

In this week’s article, Ben reflects on a powerful framework he encountered in a workshop with Dirk Appel (Essence in Process). It explores how we sometimes bring the dynamics of other relationships...parent/child, friendship, even romantic partnership...into professional spaces without realising it.

And when that happens, things can get muddied. Energy gets pulled into unspoken needs, unfulfilled expectations, and quiet frustrations.

However, when we bring awareness to the role we’re in, and the one we’re expecting from others, something shifts. Clarity returns. So does choice.

Latest article

✍️ What Kind of Relationships are You Having at Work?

Latest Podcast

🎙️ Episode 15 of The Smoosh Podcast
Title: A Sensitive Subject

What's happening with Melis

Reading:
World as Lover, World as Self. OMG! The late Joanna Macy is writing what my soul knows.

Listening to:
Lots of Paul Simon at the moment, all the oldies, remembering my Dad. 😢

Doing:
A lot of walking. Trying to hit the 50km goal in November. Plus lots of supporting leaders 1:1 in having an intentional stance to AI operationalisation. <- now there’s a word.

Pondering:
Minoan goddess culture! I’m trying to reconnect with my biological routes and I find myself in Anatolia and Crete!

What's happening with Ben

Watching:
I'm not currently reading anything, bu I'm watching a fascinating series on Apple TV called Pluribus. It's the story of a woman who is immune to a virus that has turned the rest of humanity into a hive mind of happiness. Dark comedy. My jam.

Listening to:
Diary of a CEO with Steven Bartlett. Specifically the Brené Brown episode. It's inspiring when two curious, intelligent, heart-centred people have a nourishing conversation for the benefit of others.

Doing:
Editing a short documentary for my final (yes final) gestalt therapy assignment. It's a lovely feeling to be combining my creative skills with my therapy skills. Synergy!

Pondering:
The relationships I have in different areas of my life (see this week's article). I love love love self-inquiry and this particular lens is a fascinating one. Where am I wishing for more from relationships that aren't oriented that way? Juicy!

What do you really want from your work relationships?

You've got this.

Love,